When I initially read about this concept it was communicated in a rather harsh way. I’m going to soften it a little.
We often don’t like blaming ourselves. I don’t have a job because there aren’t any going. I don’t have any money because I don’t have a job. I don’t like my job because my boss gives me grief.
What about – I don’t have a job because I, myself, haven’t gone out and found one yet? Or I don’t have a job I like because I haven’t made efforts and steps to find the right one?
Employment is a touchy subject, I understand, and I’m not saying people are unemployed because they want to be – it was merely an example. To be fair, the original mention of this was in a dieting book which basically said you’re overweight because you haven’t got yourself skinny – again, not the point.
So what is the point?
Your life is yours, and nobody else’s. Only your choices can really shape the way things turn out. So, until you stop blaming everyone and everything else, and you take full responsibility for your own life, you’re never going to change it.
Say it to yourself out loud if you need to:
I am responsible for my own life, my choices, my decisions, my future, and I’m going to take that responsibility and do something about it.
How has this affected my life? I’m losing weight, not by exercising more or eating none of the things I like, just from naturally better habits. I’m crafting my career out of my own desires, and to fit comfortably around my ideal choices for my future. I’m outlining the changes I want to make in my life and I’m working towards them. Because it’s in my hands, and nobody else’s.
Just like your life is in yours.